Gumption

I love Sunday afternoons. Sure I have homework that I could do but do I? Ha no. You see, we have Netflix. So instead of being subject to a couple movies, I have a plethora of movies (most of which I have never heard of). I found one that I love, The Holiday. It stars Cameron Diaz, Kate Winslet, Jude Law, and Jack Black. Cameron and Kate's characters decide to escape their lives and switch homes for Christmas. As I watched the movie, i realized that film illustrates many aspects of my life. Jack Black's character Miles, illustrates my number cause of dating disasters:

Miles "Why do I always fall for the bad girl (or boy in my case)?"

Iris "You didn't know she was a bad girl."

Miles " I knew she wasn't good."

Miles falls for the bad girl who doesn't appreciate his efforts. Marissa falls for the bad boys who also don't appreciate her efforts. Miles goes on to ask "why he falls for someone he knows isn't good?" Yes, Marissa why do you fall for those who aren't good? My dating pool is mainly my singles ward. I have a good friend that says "dating in your ward is like peeing in a pool". Which is so true. Ironic isn't it? The church clumps you all together and the bishop says, "date these people you go to church with. Find your help-meet." He will tell you that "John Doe is a great guy" or "Jane Doe makes the yummiest cookies." In my experience, John Doe is not a great guy. He doesn't take girls on dates instead he will text you at 11:00pm asking what you are up to. He has no real intention of treating you like you should be. He just wants to see if he can get you to his place. Has no ambition for school and spends his time playing Call of Duty in mom's basement. Yup he's a keeper Bishop. I'll get right on that *eye roll*. So back to Miles' statement on dating those who are bad. Don't do it. They aren't worth it. They really don't care about you. Don't be their doormat. Don't let the few times they surprise you, push you to place them on the "good" side of the argument. In short, they are a waste of your time and effort because it won't be returned.

Now this realization has taken me awhile to figure out. And there will probably be guys I fall for but at least I can work on it. In the past week, I've started a new thinking. It is inspired by Scarlett O'Hara from Gone With The Wind. Many find that she was manipulative and greedy but she is one of the most known heroines in classic literature. She is real to us because each person has their faults. No one is perfect. She was a women of independence and strength during a time in which women were to rely on their man for support. She refuses to let people, circumstances, and even a war get in the way of what she wants. Alot of the personality seen in the 1939 film is due to the actress Vivien Leigh who starred as Scarlett.

In The Holiday, Arthur Abbot has Iris watch films which starred leading ladies of Hollywood's Golden Age. He tells Iris that in Hollywood, there are leading ladies and best friends. He states that she is a leading lady. He has her watch these women's films and she realizes that she has been missing gumption.

Gumption: Aggressive, resourceful, courage. Synonyms: Spirit, cleverness, witty.

Iris learns Arthur's message of taking the gumption she discovers in those ladies and applying it to her life. And now so will I. After all Iris declares "you're suppose to be the leading lady of your own life". So now I'm gonna have the gumption to do things that I haven't been reluctant to do previously....in fact I started a couple days ago before writing this.